Negotiating in a complex world

I’d like to introduce to you another book I’m reading: “Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if your life depended on it,” by Chris Voss. A friend recommended it and, for months, it sat on my desk, waiting for the right moment. In January, I finally picked it up – and I’m captivated. What I’m learning applies across so many areas of my life: my work, my leadership, my service, and especially those sometimes-difficult conversations with people who see the world differently than I do. Perfect, right? 
 
The timing couldn’t be better. I’ve been wrestling with conflict in multiple areas - policy, team dynamics, client interactions, even within my own family. And I’m realizing that at the heart of it all is the same fundamental truth: relationships. Every challenge, every negotiation, every difficult conversation ultimately comes down to how well I can navigate relationships. That’s why I’m so focused on refining how I communicate - listening with an open mind and expressing my own intent with clarity and respect. 
 
I’ll share more as I dig through this book, but here’s an early takeaway that’s already stretching me: slow it down. Instead of prioritizing my argument – or even thinking ahead to my next words – Voss challenges me to shift my focus entirely to the other person. To truly listen. When you commit to that level of active listening, you disarm the other person, help them relax, and quiet the voice in their head that’s driven by fear, conflict, or distrust.
 
It’s a simple but powerful shift – and one I’m eager to practice. More to come as I keep reading. 
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See you in the trenches,
B​